This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
