She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Randomize
