Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
