what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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