Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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