you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
the liver wants what the liver wants
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
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