Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I supernannyed him into submission
I think my moral compass just broke
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
