Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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