i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
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