Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
