I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
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