gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I need to sanitize my soul.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Enjoy the penises
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
