"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
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