I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
