i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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