omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
