it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
