I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
