Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
