I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Randomize
