it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.