And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
