I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
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