PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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