That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
