Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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