You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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