I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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