ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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