I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
