JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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