He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize