Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I will be naked everywhere
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Randomize
