just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I'm jealous of your bromance
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
