in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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