I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
