Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
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