ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Randomize