Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize