Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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