It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Jerry, you need to find god
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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