oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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