Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Randomize
