The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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