the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
This baby is an asshole
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
