But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
