Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
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