lets start a swedish sibling band together
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize