my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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