I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
