Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
