I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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